Under age contraception - facing facts

# 64

Posted: 05/03/2010 13:59

Hi there, yes it is ok to use up to three packets of the pill without a break but you do risk spotting. However if this is something your are going to regularly do or you would prefer to have but only 4 periods a year you should probably talk to your doc about switching to a pill where you can do that such as seasonale / seasonique

# 63

Posted: 04/03/2010 22:51

i know this site is for underage ppl on the pill but i cant find another discussion on this for the question i need answered.my question is , is it ok to carry on ur pill,microlite for three months in a row???? i would apreciate if sumone could answer this question for me.thanks alot.

# 62

Posted: 21/11/2008 21:43

Thanks for your comment, thats a great help.

# 61

Posted: 21/11/2008 11:40

Asher, I'm not sure where you're posting from but here in Ireland, from the age of 16, one is considered a minor (no longer a child) and therefore entitled to make certain decision regarding their health, treatment and perscrptions, including the pill and also, like every other patient, is legally entitled to medical confidentiality.

So whoever told you that you haveto be 18 to be perscribed it without parenbal consent was misinformed. If ytou go to your GP, she may encourage you to tell your parents but cannot compel you to do so, nor can she refuse to perscribe without good medical reason unless she is prepared to refer you to a doctor who will perscribe (Patients Charter).

Clinics such as the IFPA and Well woman, my friedns and I fund very helpful when we wee your age - seems like a lifetime ago but I'm sure their policies on prscribign haven't changed.

# 60

Posted: 20/11/2008 19:01

I'm 17, do i require parental consent to go on the pill? ive been told that you have to be 18 to be able to get it without telling your parents...?

# 59

Posted: 20/05/2008 14:51

A typo on my part, what I MEANT was:
Vaccination reduces the risk by 70% and combined with regular smears reduces the risk by 95%.

# 58

Posted: 20/05/2008 13:55

Good advice from Barbie.
In fact only 4 strains of HPV are contributary factors to cervical abnormalities.
Vaccination reduces the risk by 70% and combined with regular smears reduces the risk by 75%.
But most women who contract HPV recover from it without any ill effects - most without knowing they have had it.

# 57

Posted: 20/05/2008 12:19

M: Generally most doctors and medical professionals will tell you that condoms help to protect against infection, but they do not eliminate all chances: the only thing that will stop you from getting these infections is refraining from sexual contact of any sort: not only penetrative sex, but also oral sex and even mutual masturbation. Clearly this is totally unrealistic for most people.

Obviously the risks are far higher when condoms are not used during penetrative sex. Hence why it's a good idea for both you and your partner to be checked properly at a GUM clinic and get the all-clear before you stop using condoms. I also believe that after three months of not using condoms both partners should be checked again, and then after that, every two years or so in a long term relationship.

With regards to HPV, hopefully the vaccine will be introduced for teenage girls and young women, as it is only really effective when given before a woman becomes sexually active. Currently, around 80% of women under the age of 50 carry the virus. It's worth remembering though that not all strains lead to abnormalities in the cervix, or to cervical cancer. Many women live with the virus without any problems.

HPV is often passed on through unprotected sex, and unfortunately, sticking to one partner doesn't necessarily help you. I caught HPV from my first long-term partner, the first person I didn't use condoms with. The only way to avoid HPV is not to have any sexual contact in your life-time, and let's face it, for the majority that just isn't an option.

# 56

Posted: 20/05/2008 09:31

You're more that welcome MsH. I'm glad to have helped and that you feel happier and more confident in your decision.

M (ON) similar to Barbie's advice, it is important to be tested regularly - unless, you can absolutely guarantee that you will only ever be with one person and they are also virgins (unrealistic and pretty much impossible). Chlamydia is treatable and most cases of HPV resolve themselves on their own but if you are concerned please do seriously consider the vaccine - in conjunction of course with regular smears.

# 55

Posted: 19/05/2008 22:23

Hi Chris
I felt obliged to reply in response to your comment on 02.05.08 regarding the HPV virus and Chlamydia. Being a 26yr old with only 2 sexual partners, both in long term relationships who has always had practiced safe sex, I've had a hard time coming to terms with the fact that these STIs can be contracted through sexual CONTACT and not intercourse has not been published and highlighted. I read all the literature and spoke with my doctor before having sex for the first time at 21 and contracted the HPV virus from my first boyfriend and Chlamydia from my 2nd. The fact that people think you have to have unprotected sex to have these is part of the reason they go undetected in so many people. All the "facts" told me I couldn't have either one of these but tests revealed a different story and only I am very conscious on this topic the Chlamydia would definitely have gone undiagnosed. I think you and everyone else should update their information so that less people are faced with this and the issues it brings after being as responsible as possible.

# 54

Posted: 19/05/2008 21:56

oh well that is very helpful indeed. i must say i came into this discussion with so many questions and eagerness for answers and worries about so many things but thanks to you chris i'm worry free and i'm now confident that when i make the decision it will be the right one and i'll be safe and happy and confident. you really have given me a great understanding of everything and i'm so thankful as there was no other place I could get such straight talking helpful advice. so thank you very much.

# 53

Posted: 19/05/2008 10:19

Ah, my throid is underactive, so that would be different alright.
I couldn't imagine the pill would affect athsma, no.
Well I'm not a doctor, but unless there is a family history of severe clots or you have an obesity problem, then I can't think of any other medical reason why it would not be perscribed. And remember the ONLY ethical reason for it not to be perscribed to a minor or adult, is a medical one and anyone who is refused it is entiteld to know what that medical reason is. If the doctor is invoking the conscience clause (and I don't see any GP doing that in this day and age) then they MUST under the patients charter of rights (1994) refer you to a doctor who will perscribe.

# 52

Posted: 16/05/2008 21:02

haha that does sound like a bit of inconvenience alright! she has a missing thyroid you see. but no i don't think it runs in the family as i or no one else that i know of has it? I have a slight touch of asthma though where i just get slight bad cough the odd time every year and i need to use inhalers for it. i doubt that would effect the pill though? the thing with the 6 months prescription i am very happy with. so do you think i will be given the pill no problem? i should really not be turned it down as that would be doing more wrong than right i think? what can i say to convince them to give it to me?i should be allowed at 16 i'm sure.

# 51

Posted: 16/05/2008 11:31

Hiya, No, after your initial appointment, you can get a perscription for 6 months, so you only need to go to the doctor twice a year.
Ditto! I have a thyroid problem too! I'm underactive - which interestingly was one of my reasons for switching to the IUD for a while. Does your sister's condition run in families? Am just interested.
my perscription for my thyroid meds is for 6 months - just like the pill was.
Sounds like your sister has repeat perscription.
I switched to contacts for convenience. Has you ever done a cardio kick-boc aerobics galls while wearing glasses? My attempts were hilarious!

# 50

Posted: 15/05/2008 21:37

i think if questions arise i will just say about period cramps and what not?it seems a good excuse and won't lead to many questions. do you have to go to the doctor every month for a prescription for the pill? my sister has a thyroid problem and takes frequent medicine. she can get a prescription that can be used 3 times or something like that so she does not need to go to the doctor the whole time. will something similar happen with the pill so as that would be very convenient for me? well I have no need for contacts yet as I've had glasses nearly all me life so that won't be a problem I don't think.

# 49

Posted: 15/05/2008 11:18

I see what you mean. It's funny, men of your Dad's generaton, in Ireland anyway, usually don't ask questions when they hear things like that .
You could say it was for a checkup, blood tests (altho that might lead to more questions), periods pains or something like that - the period pain excuse would cover you nicely for the pill too I suppose.
I know it's awful to feel you have to lie to the people you love and respect but sometimes we tell lies to spare those people and ourselves the pain of an honesty they are not ready or willing to hear.
This will give you a laugh - my mother didn't know anything about my contraceptive choices until I was in my 30's! I asked her to collect a copy of the recipt for the IUD from the chemist (for tax reasons) while I was away. But the pharmacist (whom I've known all my life) wouldn't give it to her and said it was for reasos of patient confidentiality!!!
The generation gap is always bigger, the younger you are. My Mam is is her sixties now and seems less conservative than she was 20 years ago.
Yep - altho parents tend to be stricter with theit oldest, the youngest is seen as "the baby" and I see your point about your eldest brother. I remember having a similar conversation with my partners sister, an only girl and the youngest but my partner could never see his "baby sister" as being an independant sexually active twenty year-old woman. I call this "half-nesia" a selective amnesia about ones own youth when it comes to recognising things which one doesn't like or doesn't wish to see - sort of like fogetting that one was young once oneself.
I wore glasses for years myself before switching to lenses. No, the pill won't affect your sight but it may cause dryness which may make your eyes intolerant to long-term contact lens wear. Tho with the daily dispoables I suppose contact lens technology is improving all the time.

# 48

Posted: 14/05/2008 21:10

well our clinic is really close so and we live in the country so dad would have to drive me. usually when i say 'woman reasons' they usually dont ask question funnily enough. so i could make up something and just say i need to go back for check ups maybe? see i love my parents and i respect them but really to be honest i'd say they are old fashioned in a way. my mam is in her 50's my dad his 60's so i dont know perhaps they would feel I'm too young.actually no they would think i'm too young. also as i'm the youngest in the family the probably still see me as the ''baby''. also my 3 older brothers and 2 older sisters would all find out and i especially dont think my eldest brother would take lightly to my boyfriend? they are all really protective of me i suppose and again they also see me as the 'baby'. well i definitely dont smoke. i wouldn't touch the things! i wear glasses though does that mean the pill will affect my sight in anyway?

# 47

Posted: 14/05/2008 10:10

You're welcome. What I did was go to a clinic in Dublin (I live about 15 miles outside it). They took it that I was meeting friends or window shopping.
I always kept mine with me and took it in the bathroom - so the question of them seeing me, never arose. It would be nice if you could tell them but sometimes parents are the hardest people to talk to. You are entitled to your confidentality if you feel that this is something they just could not hear or take on board.
An IUD (also referred as an IUS) stands for intra-uterine device. My one is called the mirena and also contains a synthetic progesterone which is slowly released into the womb. It is fitted by a gynaecologist and lasts for 5 years after which it is either replaced or an alternative method of contraception must be used. It is suitable for older women (well, I'm in my 30's) whose bodies have matured and are in secure long term relaitonships. It contains no ostrogen and works in three ways.
With some typs of pill and depending on when you start your period - your doctor will advise, you'll need to use a barrier method (condoms) for the first seven days (I know you'll be using these anyway). After which it is safe to have sex at anytime as the pill works to prevent ovulation.
Also I forgot to mention, in my last post. If you smoke, it is contraindiated with the pill. The pill can also make your eyes senstive with regard to contact lenses.

# 46

Posted: 13/05/2008 21:09

ok thank you for that. i do feel more happier and at ease now. i think in the summer i will start it so hopefully all that will go well. and yes i'm doing the junior cert btw. i really like how in a slight way your experiences are similar to me it's really helpful. could i ask your advice on what i could tell my parents why i'm going to the doctor frequently and on the off chance if they see me taking a tablet? and yes i think i'll be either using my phone or watch to help me cause i want to take it properly. can i ask out of curiosity what is IUD? i never heard of it before but I'm sure I'm too young for it just interested into what it is. also when on the pill is it safe to have sex at anytime or do you have to avoid ovulation times?

# 45

Posted: 13/05/2008 09:47

MsH, he sounds like a lovely guy. Yes, you can get extra safe condoms but there are still only one method of contraception (and of course are important in preventing STI;'s). Bear in mind that the forth generation contraceptive pill (the most recent ones available) are among the safest ever perscribed. For the record, I and several of my friends were on the pill for over a decade - these were tri-phasic (3rd generation pills) and never had a problem with them. Your doctor will assess which are the most suitable for you.
The inner leaflet of your pill will list the side effects. Discuss these with the doctor as well. Bear in mind that every medication has side effects - I am on two forms of medication currently (not contraceptive) and if I read the last of side-effects every day, I'd spend the morning thinking about them but remember, they affect a small minority of people.
If you want two forms, then that is what you should have, it's YOUR body. Remember that. ,
Side effects - realistically, what I got was weight gain and break-through bleeding with my first pill. This disappeared when I switched pills. Some women can suffer with headaches initially. These are the most common. There is a listed side effect of clots, in women with a history of clotting problems. The actual risk is tiny.
If you look on the manufacturers website for specific brands,they will list the side effects. (Mercilon and femodene is what I was on, if that helps) The positive side-effects are better skin if you are acne-prone, a lower risk of ovarian cancer, regular reminders about smear tests, if you are the forgetful kind, but you probably won't need to worry about them for a while, a period which was shorter lighter and super-predictable. I'm talking - it started on day 24 between 2.30 and 4pm! That was my experience. What I use and trust now is the mirena iud. I never stopped trusting the pill. I just find the IUD far more convenient. It is considered to be a long term contraceptive and provides a steady progesterone supply without oestrogen. I also have other medical related reasons for using it, which aren't really related to this discussion. Exams provide enough pressure (I suppose you're doing your junior cert) without having to think about the pill. It's funny, I put off the decision myself until after my leaving cert! It will mean taking it over the Summer tho' and if your timetable is irregular you NEED to be sure to take it at the same time every day. Set a reminder on your mobile, watch, inside your purse - whatever works for you. Just after brushing my teeth worked for me.

# 44

Posted: 12/05/2008 21:08

chris: i was discussing wit my guy the other day about in the future how I would like to take the next step. i said of how I'm not fully ready now but that soon sometime in the future I would like to share that with him. he was very concerned and wanted to make sure i was 100% positive in my decision and after i convinced him he was really touched that i would love and trust him enough to take that step with him. we began talking about contraception, and that was the first thing we discussed actually, i told him how i would like to go on the pill and condoms. he was concerned about the pill and told me i didn't have to as there is these extra safe condoms that are twice as thick.i began saying how i still would feel more happier and safer with both. he said he was worried there might be side affects and stuff? but he told me if it's both i want then it's both i' ll get. which was pretty great of him. just interested in how bad side effects can be like be realistic?i' m not allergic to anything btw. also if anyone here is on the pill can you share your experience with it? and perhaps tell me what contraception you use and trust ? i think i will ask for the pill after my exams because do not want to be worrying about it or that. that will give me near 3 months to settle into the pill and make sure it is working. what do think chris?

# 43

Posted: 12/05/2008 10:28

Helen, logic and a knowledge of biology should tell you that correct use of reliable contraception is directly indicative of whether a woman will have an unplanned pregnancy.

Now the CPA stats are surely based on those who have experienced a crisis pregnancy, therefore they are unlikely to take in the majority of women who haven't and thus don't contain any data on those women.
It would be rather like using stats from opthalmologists and opticians and then saying that 80% of people have eye problems.

# 42

Posted: 12/05/2008 09:35

You're welcome MsH. You know it's funny your guy sounds a lot like my own was, in the same situation and oddly enough I had used the driving example before I read your post! .
But it applies to many things - sports, socialising, life in general.
At 16 you are no longer a child, you're a minor but as you say also an individual. There are certain things that some people are mature enough for at 16 and there are other things they won't feel ready for until they are in their 20's.

# 41

Posted: 12/05/2008 09:28

Helen, on the statistical surveys shown and data from clinics which provide reproductive health care, you are in fact quite wrong. The average is just over 17 for women and eighteen for men. This average doesn't differ a great deal from twenty years ago, in fact. Yes some people wait until they're older and some are younger, which would be logical considering that it's an average. But as I said this will depend on the woman and what is right for her - not me (I made those decsions many years ago) you or anyone else.
I don't know where you're getting or research from from but again the facts are that the liklihood of contracting an STI or getting pregnant ditrectly corelates with a lack of relaible condom and contraceptive use. Lack of safe reliable contraception fdoesn't stp people having sex, it exposes them to greater risk. Barbie's example in an earlier post explains that very clearly.
Once you are sexually active, you start taking risks - be that at 16 or 46. Just as the sooner in life you start driving the more likely you are to have an accident. Does that mean we try to stop people from driving? Of course not but we ensure that we are responsible enough to follow all the rules and drive safely. In short, once you start living , you start taking risks. It's called life.
For the record, I became sexually active at 17 - no accidents no STI'S almost 20 years later. I started driving at 22 and despite the best care and precaution, have been in two minor accidents. Does that make me wish I'd never started to drive? Of course not.
I had a very quick look at the birds and bees website and the first thing I saw was more misinformation regarding the spread of AIDS. The ONLY thing which is slowing the spread of AIDS in Uganda is the ABC program - which is a combination or abstention, fidelity and condom use. Furthermore the promotion of an abstinence only program in the U.S. resulted in a dramatic increase in teen pregnancies in Texas. Because abstinance only programs do not cause young people to abstain but result in them not seeking contraceptive care when they inevitably become sexually active. MsH, whether you make the decision to becoem sexually active AT 16 OR 26, please go to the ifpa website and get some factual information.

# 40

Posted: 10/05/2008 11:43

Chris, there is significant research that indicates that the age at which women become sexually active has a major bearing on whether she will have an unplanned pregnancy.

The most recent Irish research on this is from the Crisis Pregnancy Agency. It’s findings include the following:

• Women who start sex before the age of 17 are 70% more likely to experience a crisis pregnancy than those who waited;
• 43% of women who had first sex before 17 regretted it later;
• 80% of young women do not have sex until they are 17 or older.

I am sorry if I seem to be the party-pooper here; I don’t mean to be. But it is imperative that the facts regarding the impact of early sexual behaviour are made clear. For more factual data supporting this, the CPA has all it’s findings on it’s website - crisispregnancy.ie/pressrelease.php?id=71

# 39

Posted: 09/05/2008 19:41

here is the website I think might be helpful
birdsandbees.ie/

# 38

Posted: 09/05/2008 18:47

BARBIE: I will definitely without a doubt be using both condoms and the pill I would feel so much more safe and confident with them both. I want to be clear of all doubt before i consent as I don't want to regret anything. I have the right guy so all I need is the time. My boyfriend is very patient i mean it its amazing. he does not feel sex is a major part of our relationship but when I'm ready he'll be ready. He's a serious giver all he cares about is my happiness and that's why I'm so much more comfortable and happy in knowing when the time is right it will be with him. CHRIS: i really appreciate your advice. really I feel you really understand me and can relate almost. I believe yes there is no 100% method in anything. Sex is a risk but it can also be great I'm sure. there is going to be a lot of things in life with risks. driving for instance, there is always the risk of crashing and mad lunatics on the road around every corner. does that mean I'm never going to drive though? if you learn to drive correctly, take all precautions and drive safely then your as safe as you can be. sex is the same am I going to let risks like this stop me? If i learn to take all precautions and be as safe as I can be ,and not just me, my boyfriend also, then I should not need to worry. I know driving isn't exactly ideal to compare to sex and i 'm not doing that I'm simply stating about risk taking and using an everyday example.
also about the age of sex. Ireland has the highest age of consent in Europe. its no exactly realistic? northern Ireland have gone down to 16 and there is talks of the republic doing the same. I personally believe no one can tell you once your over 16 or lower(depending on the person) what age you are mature enough. everyone is there OWN individual and can make there own decisions.

# 37

Posted: 09/05/2008 18:23

thank you Chris, Barbie and Helen I really do appreciate everything your saying and I am taking in every bit of advice you have. First off i would be using a dual contraception pill and condoms as i would feel so much more confident in using them.
Helen, My boyfriend knew what he was getting into when we first began going out as I was younger there was the chance I would not have sex until I am much older. I do not feel pressured by anyone(boyfriend or friends) and I am lucky for that. None of my friends have had sex so it's not like i feel i 'have' to have sex to be 'cool'. what outlook on sex would that be? I would never have sex just for popularity.I'm not one of them girls. The reason why I am considering sex is that I'm in love with my boyfriend as we have such a trusting open relationship(we have been together a good 6-7 months), I feel I'm mature enough and understanding to make my own decision and I would love to be able to be that close with my boyfriend. I would love for us both to be able to share such intimacy together. I am not letting anyone make my decisions it is completely up to me I know. an average number is only a number though, I am a individual not a number. I really do appreciate your advice and you must understand it's not like when i hit 16 I'm going to jump into sex it could be another few months yet? I don't know when I'll be ready but I know it won't be years anyway. I'm sorry but in my opinion I just don't see the point it won't really make a difference.

# 36

Posted: 09/05/2008 13:27

Hi again Msh,
this is the second part of my comment that didnt publish earlier for some reason;

Despite what the papers, mags or TV might say, most young people in Ireland do not have sex until they are at least 18. Yes, we all hear about people who start younger, but the average age is 18 and many actually wait until they are older still. All the research shows that the younger you start, the more likely you are to contract a disease or get pregnant. With the best will in the world and with all the knowledge in the world about contraception, etc, once you are sexually active, you start taking risks.

If you and your boyfriend are truly in love, then waiting for at least a couple of years will allow you further time to develop your own knowledge and views on the subject.

I wish you every blessing for the future. I ‘started’ quite early myself, and despite knowing lots and lots about contraception at the time, made some big mistakes. I wish someone had told me that it is much better to wait and that it is not impossible to do so. Hopefully I am that person for you.

By the way, this website might be helpful - http://www.birdsandbees.ie/

# 35

Posted: 09/05/2008 12:20

Every young woman is different. Not all are so naieve or frankly credulous that they believe they must have sex simply because their friends are. But equally, if one is ready, they should surely also not be influenced by a peer group telling them "don't do it".
Helen, perhaps you could explain exactly why you thing delaying becoming sexually active, if you is ready of course, by a year or two, will make a difference?
I too have "been there" and that is not my experience at all. Bu then I have not been sruck by the "parental amnesia" which bests so many who seem to forget what it was like to be 16.
If you want to wait MsH - let that be YOUR decison, not mine, Helens' or anyone else's. Only you can decide when you are ready.

# 34

Posted: 09/05/2008 12:08

Again, sound advice from Barbie,
Helen, It's true there is no one method which is 100% effective against infection or pregnancy (except of course a tubal ligation in the case of the latter, which obviously is unsuitable for you, MsH). But if we all took that view we'd never had sex! The truth is that there is no method which is 100% effective against ANYTHING. That is Life. There are risks, big and small but there are also rewards big and small.

The fact of the matter is that at 16, a girl is already sexually mature in the physical sense for about four years and through-out history, 16 would have been late average for becoming sexually active as many young women, right up to the the beginning of the 1900's were married at that age. The change in trend as cultutral as women delayed becomign sexual active or marrying as moe life opportunbitiesw became available. This trend changed back with the availability of medically reliable contraception, when women realised that they could bcome sexually active without delay or foregoing life opportunities which they would have had to do in an earlier era as becoming sexually active was and is not longer inextricably linked to automatic parenthood or marriage. So in fact, 15/16 is not young to start becoming sexually active - which is very possibly why it's the norm.

# 33

Posted: 09/05/2008 11:03

MsH: only you will know when you are ready. The best thing to do, as you're thinking about having sex, is be prepared. See your doctor once your 16, and start discussing different methods of contraception. Don't rush into anything; ask if she's got a few leaflets you can take home, do some research of your own (www.fpa.org has info on different methods, including pros and cons), have a word with your sister, and work out what you think will suit you best. Then go back to the doctor and see about getting contraception prescribed; I wouldn't rely on condoms alone as they can be unreliable. So choose a method like the pill and combine it with condoms.

Not wanting to speak to your mum about it doesn't necessarily mean you're not ready; many adults don't like to speak to family members about these things! But if you're having doubts, that might indicate you're not quite ready yet.

# 32

Posted: 09/05/2008 09:43

You're welcome MsH, When the time comes that you're ready and you're 16, the decision as regards what contraceptive is suitable for you will be between you and your doctor (and anyone else you choose to discuss it with of course). If there is a reason why the pill is not suitable for you, you have the RIGHT to know what that reason is.
The lady doctor sounds very suitable. If you don't feel you can talk you your Mum, then you don't feel you can talk to her, with your sister tho, remember she was 16 one time as well. But, you know her best and it's up to you. I just remember when I was in that situation, it would have been nice to have someone to talk it over with. But it's up to you of course.
Emailing your eldest could help. And yes, I get what you're saying about feeling embarrassed and uncomfortable. Being ready will mean that you feel comfortable and and confident about it - not ashamed or embarrassed. And it should not be something you regret. If it were me, I would say wait until you're ready and mail your sister then for a chat.

# 31

Posted: 08/05/2008 22:13

Hi MsH,
It is very responsible of you to try and find out all the facts before making a decision. Most of the facts that people will present you with will be ways in which to minimize the risk of infection or pregnancy. However, the truth is that no one ‘method’ is 100% proof for infection or pregnancy. Yes, you can reduce the risk, but you cannot eliminate it. It is important you know this BEFORE you make a decision to become sexually active.

The truth is that 15/16 is young to start becoming sexually active. It may seem the norm ‘nowadays’ and many of your friends may already be ‘doing it’ but even a delay of a year or two will make a difference (believe me, I’ve been there!). You seem to have a patient boyfriend which is great. He may feel that as he is 18 that he should be having sex but it’s very important that he understands that 15/16 really is very young for you. Many people say that ‘ah teenagers are going to have sex, there is nothing you can do, etc’. Don’t let others make your decision for you. If you want to wait, then do not feel that doing so is ‘uncool’ or untrendy, etc.

# 30

Posted: 08/05/2008 20:07

Thank you very much Chris for that. that helped a lot .Everyone like just keeps telling you what you should not do and all that but no one ever tells you up front what you 'can' actually do. that will only lead to taking risks trying to figure it out yourself and I'm not willing to do that because I won't risk it. so if When the time comes that I am ready and I'm 16 i will be allowed to be given contraception? There is a really nice lady doctor in my local doctor's clinic. she's very easy to talk to so she would be a great help I'm sure as she seems very understanding. so she would be my best bet. In relation to the talking to my mam about it; I don't think i would be able to as there is a great age gap between us and she comes from a different generation, shes in her 50's I'm 16.I would not feel comfortable.
we never talk about that kind of thing. My older sister(23) and I have a great relationship and are very close so she would be an option, but I'd still be nervous talking to her as I'd feel she'd judge me and just tell me not to and if I did and she found out she'd never look at me the same. I don't think she would be as bad but me and her never really discuss sex but we do mostly everything else just not that yet, she probably thinks I'm to young?
However my other older sister(28) lives in england and she's a nurse so I could email her?I don't know would she be frequently looking at her emails but i could text her to let her know. I think I can trust her to be confidential and also she's a far distance from me so I wouldn't have to look at her. See me not been able to talk to my older sisters face to face without being ashamed also makes me feel that I'm not ready? I want to be completely comfortable with the situation as sex with my boyfriend should not be something I feel ashamed or cheap about. I hear of so many woman and men regretting their first time and I don't want to be one of them in the future.
Would there be any need to email her now if I'm not ready to do anything yet?

# 29

Posted: 07/05/2008 10:34

That's some sound well thought out advice from Barbie.
I'd also like to mention that when you do become sexually active, it is vital to have a regular smear.

# 28

Posted: 07/05/2008 10:07

Re condom/STD/HPV debate:

condoms do protect against STD's for the most part. However, obviously condoms can and do fail, and it is possible to catch certain STD's (like genital warts, genital herpes, and HPV) even if you use condoms. The only way to ensure you definitely don't catch an STD is to refrain from ANY sexual contact. Which isn't really an option for most..!

Having more partners does not mean you will 'more than likely have an STI': practicing unsafe sex will. You might have slept with 20 people, but been careful to use condoms every time, and be in the practice of having regular STD checks. You might have slept with two people you hardly know, not used condoms with either, and not bothered getting checked. Guess who's more likely to have an STD?...

The pill IS linked to cervical erosion; however, cervical erosion is not dangerous, more an inconvenience; it does not lead to cancer and often disappears on it's own.

Pill use for over 5 years has been linked to an increased risk of cervical cancer: experts are not sure why, but it is thought that women on the pill may be less likely to use condoms, so more likely to have HPV, so more likely to develop cancer. It's thought that it may also speed up cells developing from pre-cancerous to cancerous, but again, no-one is really sure.

Teenagers should be informed of the risks, and informed of the different methods of contraception available. IMO, the best way to protect yourself when you start having sex, is to make sure you're on a reliable method of contraception, like the pill, injection etc. Then, to be aware that condoms are essential to protect against STD's. So, condoms should be used ALWAYS when not in a relationship. If someone is in a long-term relationship, both they and their partner should have an STD check and blood test (for HIV) before considering stopping to use condoms. They should also know each other well and trust each other.

Anyone who is sexually active should also have regular STD checks. I personally have them done every 6 months if I'm not in a relationship (even though I use condoms religiously) and in a relationship, I have one after 1 month, before I stop using condoms, then another 3 months later to double-check, then every 12-18 months.

People, including teenagers, are going to have sex, both in and out of relationships. Sex is fun and enjoyable if enjoyed by two mature people. Provided people are sensible and take proper precautions, sex is also pretty safe to indulge in.

Having a prudish attitude, trying to stop teenagers having sex, or making it difficult for teenagers to get contraception and information will not stop teenagers having sex. All it will do is result in a rise in STD infection and an increase in teen pregnancies.

If I had a teenager son or daughter my main concerns would be that they were ready for sex, and that they understood safe sex, and the risks. As long as they were being safe and sensible, that's all that would matter to me.

# 27

Posted: 07/05/2008 09:11

Hi MsH, first of all, I think it's excellent that you are interested in your own health and take a pro-active approach to sexual healthcare - including contraceptioin for when you'll need it.
You're perfectly right to wait until you're ready and have all the information you need. This is not something anyone ever has the right to make you feel guilty over or pressured about.
I'm not sure what you need to know but your local IFPA (Everywoman) Clinic or Well woman clinic should be able to provide you with any medical informaiton in a respectful, factual and confidential manner. They have a duty of confidential care once you reach 16.
Given the fact that you are already concerned and seeking information and that you are willing to admit that you don't feel ready yet but at the same time aren't willing to be pressured indicates maturity and indeed making the right choice for you. And taking the correct precautions is your entitlement once over 16.
What your doctor may suggest is that given your age, you use a low dose combined pill (such as mercillon or Femodene, which were two I used). If the first brand does not suit after a couple of months, you and your doctor may want to investigate switching to something which does.
You need a perscription for the pill and an everywoman clinic may be able to perscribe and dispense if you want. You can buy condoms in most pharmacies altho your doctor may add these to your perscription also and they may be available at your clinic. and I'd like to add that I think it's very sensible of you to decide, when the time comes, take precuations by using both a hormonal and barrier method of contraception. Over the age of 16, you are legally considered to be a minor rather than a child or an adult and as a minor you are entitled to make your own decisions regarding certain medical situations - contraception being one of them and you are entitled to medical confidentiality, so choose a doctor or clinic you know you can trust.
The IFPA (everywoman) clinic have a website if you do an internet search (don't think I'm allowed post links here) and Wellwoman may have one also.

No, there is not much information going around, in fact unless you know where to look (and if you did you wouldn't be asking) and possibly not much eduaiton on the subject in schools either. What I will say tho', is, have you thought about discussing it with your Mum or older adult whom you can talk to in confidence before making the decision? Not every parent is approachable I know and I'm not saying every young person Must discuss it with their parents first but it's just a suggestion. Hope this helps.

# 26

Posted: 06/05/2008 17:38

I am interested. I will be 16 soon and my boyfriend is 1 year and 11 months older than me. now I'm really concerned with the whole contraception business. now me and my boy friend have not consented in sex mostly cause i know myself I'm not ready and I want to be able to gather as much information about risks and concerns but what really annoys me is there is really very little on the subjects i want to know about. my boyfriend is great he is never putting pressure on me for anything like sex or that he just wants to make sure I'm happy and comfortable. I'd like to think I'm mature for my age and I'm capable of making my own decision so when I think the time is right I will go for it as if i make the right choice and take the right precautions that I think i have earned that right. well thats my own opinion. what i want to know however is there a pill out there suitable for everyone/most people?
can you get the pill and condoms by prescription? also if I'm over 16 i am allowed to be submitted contraception by my doctor right?

Also if anyone can tell me of a site where i can find information that I need and want and that is a Irish site (most preferred) or on a site where I can keep updated on the hopeful changes in the consent laws (as i really do feel 17 is an unrealistic age like its the 'highest' in Europe?)

I'm just a near 16 year old girl curious in getting information as there is not much information going around and i think someone should do something about that.

# 25

Posted: 02/05/2008 08:56

Helen, I have never heard so much misnformation and frankly balderdash in my life.
Chlamydia and HPV are STIs - Sexually transmitted infections so to say that condoms do not prevent their transmission is simply not true.
These infections can go undetected for life - which is why it s important to be tested regularly. HPV can cause cervical cancer which is why it is VITAL for every sexually active female to have a regular smear test. This along with vaccination prevents 95% of cervical cancers, as stated by medical specialists in the area/
To say that the pill causes infertiliy and cervical eversion is completely untrue. It does NOT cause cervical cancer, HPV does as already stated.
Cervical cell changes are in fact more commonly detected in women using contraception (all effective contraceptive methods are "artificial" but then so is all medicine and modern lifestyle) because they have regular smears.
There will not be a case of "allowing" your teen to go on the pill as that is between herself and her doctor. But the worst thing one can do is prevent your sexually active teen going on the pill because this does NOT stop them having sex - believe me, I know, it simply runs the risk of them getting pregnant at a young age and the further risk of them having an abortion. No parent wants to be responsible for that.
To say that having a number of sexual partners means that one will "more than likely" have an STI is simply misinformation but denying contraception doesn't prevent this - it causes it.
To say that abstinence is the best way you can advise your child until they meet the person they are to spend the rest of their life with is not only misinformation, it is totally and utterly unrealistic. Do you want to tell your teen she should abstain from sex until she's maybe thirty? Do you imagine she would ever take you seriously again? Furthermore it has been proven by U.S. studies that Abstinence only education does not reduce STI's or teen pregnancies, it actually increases them because it does not stop young people having sex it just greatly reduces the liklihood of them seeking contraception or sexual healthcare.
But supposing we suspend our disbelief for a moment and imagine that your teen abstains until they have met their one true love at say 26 - then what are you going to advise? A baby anually until menopause so that they can avoid the pill or all other "artificial contraception"? Would you ever take your head out of the clouds and educate yourself.