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When the symptoms of mental illness first appear in someone close to us, we may attribute the problem to drugs, alcohol, adolescence, or menopause. Unlike other physical illnesses, mental illness shows itself through behaviour. At first, the symptoms may be subtle - irritability, withdrawing from people, and neglecting physical appearance. The person affected may deny that anything is wrong with him. "I'd be fine if everyone would just leave me alone!"
We don't want to admit to ourselves or to anyone else that something frightening is happening to someone we love. We may worry that we may have done something to cause the illness. We may be concerned about what our friends or neighbours will think of our relative's strange behaviour.
Often, our first instinct is to try to deal with the problem on our own. "If I could just reason with him, maybe he will pull himself together." Remember that he is as frightened as you are by what is happening to him.
Eventually, the symptoms may become too serious for us to handle on our own and we need to seek outside help. The first visit will often be to a general practitioner who may make a referral to a psychiatrist. If the person is very agitated or talking about suicide, he may need to go to hospital.
The first hospitalisation can be a difficult time for families. Seeing your loved one heavily medicated in hospital can be very upsetting. The doctors, nurses, psychologists, social workers, or other staff involved with his care will be only too happy to talk to you. Don't be afraid to ask any questions you have, no matter how trivial you think they are. You have a right to know what to expect when your relative comes home from hospital.
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